Sebastian Coe furious as Steve Ovett launches his own Olympics

February 16, 2010

Speaking at the launch for London 2011, Ovett said: “I have been planning my Olympic Games for some time, but mostly from the middle of the field where no-one could see me. I have just been waiting for the right moment to break.”

“This is so typical,” said an enraged Lord Coe, “I have dedicated my life to making London 2012 a success and, just as we enter the final lap, Steve Ovett appears on my shoulder and overtakes me.”

Performing a lap of honour, a triumphant Ovett crowed: “London 2011 will be the greatest Olympic Games ever. The stadium is built, a fully integrated transport system is in place, we have a decent logo and best of all, Boris Johnson has agreed to stay away.”

Ovett is believed to have been secretly plotting his revenge on Coe for years. At the end of the 2008 Beijing Olympics he was seen running off with the Olympic Torch and cackling like a maniac. Ovett then held the torch to ransom until the International Olympic Committee agreed to give him a Games of his own.

Close friend of Lord Coe, William Hague, said, “Seb is absolutely devastated. I tried consoling him but he just sits there, rocking backwards and forwards and punching an Olympic mascot.”

After the launch, Ovett said: “London 2011 is much more than just a sporting event. These games are about making a real investment, a long-term commitment to destroying the hopes and dreams of Sebastian Coe.” 

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